A Diva State of Mind

The Boston Marathon explosion: another tragedy where innocent people were targeted. My heart aches again. I sat on the train speechless after hearing the news trying to comprehend how something like this could happen. After all, it’s the Boston Marathon; one of the most popular events of the year.  And this year at the marathon, the victims of the Newton shooting were being honored; a tragedy many are still mourning. Can’t we get a break from something bad happening??

In our lifetime, we have experienced some immense tragedies: Newtown, Virginia Tech, Columbine High School, movie theatre and military base shootings, Oklahoma City bombing, and 9-11 and more.

Source: www.961wodz.com

While sitting in silence on the metro yesterday, I was sad but also frustrated.  Why is there so much evil in this world? Why is it no longer safe for us to be at schools, movie theatres and marathons? Why do others feel the need to destroy our sense of security? Is there something we should be doing differently to help avoid these types of tragedies in the future? Why is there so much hate and not more love?

Every time an incident of this magnitude is reported on the news, I sit in shock. My heart aches for the victims and for those families whose lives will never be the same.  I’m not sure what we can do to try and prevent things like this from happening in the future.  While we all deal with our own way of internalizing, these events also put things in perspective. Some people in other countries experience incidents like this on a daily basis. I know the sadness I feel when something happens here. I can’t imagine the emotional suffering those in other countries face continuously. We as a world need healing.  All I can do is express how I feel and pray for those affected by these horrible tragedies both nationwide and worldwide.

Let this tragedy, like all others, be a reminder to live a full life. One filled with love, laughter and compassion.

I didn’t grow up dreaming of a career in fashion. I wanted to work in sports. At first I wanted to be the next Pam Oliver; reporting sport news from the side lines.  Then my focused changed to sports marketing. The desire to work in fashion didn’t materialize until I was in grad school.

We hear people all the time say “I’ve wanted to sing since I was nine” and now they’re a major music artist. I saw a story on Wednesday about a guy who plays in a major orchestra. When he was little he wrote on a notepad that he was going to be the best at playing his instrument when he grew up.  When I hear those stories, I always feel like I’m behind the curve because I didn’t pursue a fashion career sooner.  So I often struggle with having faith in where my career is going.  Why would God fill me with the desire to want to have a fashion career if it currently looks like it isn’t moving in that direction? Will styling just be a hobby? Will I work a 9 to 5 I’m not passionate about for the next 30 years?

My desire for a career in fashion is stronger now than its ever been so it is no coincidence that I started reading DeVon Franklin’s book, Produced by Faith. Franklin is the VP of Production for Columbia Pictures and a minister.  In his book, he provides a guide on how to remain steadfast in faith while pursuing your dreams.  Talk about a wake up call!!! I wish y’all could see me when I’m reading this book. You would think I was studying for a test the way I have highlighted the pages!

Franklin shares his story of how he rose to where he is in his career; discussing the steps he took, how he relied on God and some of the challenges he faced. It’s not easy being a Christian while trying to work in Hollywood! Because I think this book is really an eye opener, I wanted to share some excerpts. I’ve highlighted too many lines to share in one post, so here are just a few things that really struck a cord with me:

“The trouble is that when you are a character in a story – when you are immersed in it – you can’t see how things will progress in the future….It becomes very easy to assume things will always be the way they are today.”

“So if your career is shaping who you become, and your faith isn’t integrally involved in your career choices, then what good is your faith?”

“While you are considering the Big Idea for your future, consider this: It’s got to be about more than getting promoted, getting a raise, or even becoming a star.  It must also be about how you can make an impact on the world and become a living example of God’s divine power.”

“We all struggle with ego and a sense of entitlement. We think we’re smart enough to know how to navigate through this complicated life, or that what we want is what is best for us. In reality, we don’t have the answers.  God does….It was about who I was going to be in God’s eyes – his servant or my own.”

“What matters today is not where you are today, but what kind of person God is shaping you to become in preparation for the time when he brings his vision for your life to fruition.”

“Be bold enough to request your ideal schedule from God, but be confident enough in him to agree to his schedule even if it differs from the time line you’ve had in your mind.”

I’m about half way through the book but it has definitely been life changing. More than anything, this book has helped me focus on ways I can build a stronger relationship with God.  Being that I am a work in progress, not only to be a better servant of God but to also live my life’s purpose, this book has definitely provided great guidance.

I HIGHLY recommend Produced by Faith for anyone, but specifically for those like me who may struggle with faith as you pursue your career and those searching to build a closer relationship with God. I promise, from what I’ve read so far, you won’t be disappointed.

Produced by Faith is available at Amazon.

This video has been spreading over the internet like wild fire!

I first saw “A Pep Talk from Kid President” on The Seventh District blog on Tuesday and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect.  After seeing the video posted on Facebook and receiving it from a friend via email, I knew I had to share.

This pep talk will surely inspire you to get moving!

You were made to be awesome!

“I pray 2013 is the year of your destiny, your purpose manifested and your year to feel the power of love! You are produced by faith! Happy New Year!!”  - DeVon Franklin

2013 has arrived….let’s make it ours!

In less than 5 days, we’ll be celebrating a new year.  Time flies when you’re having fun!

It has been a great year! I worked new clients this year on my own and through the Style for Hire network. I was also able to showcase my styling skills by working on makeovers for SNOBSWAP and an editorial for Façon Magazine.

This year I committed myself to a dating challenge and encouraged you to join me! We had fun pushing ourselves outside our comfort zone (I hope you had fun doing so).  Life begins when you challenge yourself and step outside of what’s comfortable. I knew if I blogged about it I would be held accountable for challenging myself all year. So thank you for joining me on that journey.

Styling clients and dating weren’t the only things keeping me busy this year.  DC had some great events. I loved the BET Hip Hop Awards Style Lounge and Beauty That Runs Deeper Concert Series And the year would not have been complete without the A Diva State of Mind Three Year Anniversary Party! I am truly humbled by the support I have received over the three years and really appreciate everyone who reads this blog.

Those are just a few of the major highlights of 2012. With so much that has happened this year, I pray it is only the beginning of what is yet to come. I am excited to see what 2013 has to offer!

Are you ready for the New Year? What are you looking forward to in 2013?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I think last week was the first time I took an entire week off from writing and uploading blog posts. I didn’t intend to take a break, but after returning from out of town, working the 9 to 5, styling a new client after work, and attending an event after work, this girl was tired! And there wasn’t really much on my mind so I did not feel the need to try and force a post.

I have always been the type to stay busy. When I was a child, I was involved in numerous activities.  Even when I vow to take a week off from attending events or doing anything after work, I find myself not getting home until 10 or 11pm three to four nights a week.  Or I end up staying up past my bedtime to work on a post.  But what I learned last week is that we all need to take a break sometimes in various areas of our lives.

Yes I know, it doesn’t seem like I took a break because I did other things last week that kept me busy, but blogging takes a lot of time.  One post, depending on content, can take up to 2 hours to complete.  While I didn’t take a break from being busy, taking a break  from blogging did allow me to meet with a new client,  see folks I hadn’t seen in a while and sit comfortably on my couch Friday night to watch TV, without a computer in my lap (that’s my normal blogging routine).  

Occasionally we need to take a break to recharge our batteries and to get the creative juices going again; otherwise, we’ll burn ourselves out. Then how productive will we be??  It is necessary to take a step back and breathe for a minute.  This gives us time to really think, refocus our efforts and move forward full of energy. 

So while you continue to work hard and stay busy remember to take a break every once in a while!!

While searching for a picture to use in this post, I came across Time Management Ninja. They offer great advice on taking a break from work.

Photo: Evelyn Parham

Clutch Magazine post Wise Words just about every day. While they’re all great, some stand out more than others like this one.

“Decide that you won’t allow the whims of others to dictate how you feel about yourself—for real, for real.

While others are certainly entitled to their opinions, you’re entitled to living your life on your own terms, and if what they’re saying wrecks your flow or makes you feel less than….keep on moving and don’t even give a damn about it.” – Britini Danielle, Clutch Magazine

Happy Friday!

Thought we’d start the week off with some inspiration!

The Marc and Angel Hack Life blog provides tips on how to live a productive and fulfilling life.  Last week they posted 10 Enemies of Personal Greatness.  I sat at my desk nodding to each enemy I read and knew I had to share this with others.  According to Marc and Angel, these ten inner enemies can ruin your grandest plans and intentions.

1. Always taking the path of least resistance. –Good things come to those who work hard and struggle to pursue the goals and dreams they believe in.
2. Comparing yourself to everyone else. – You will never fully believe in yourself if you keep comparing yourself to everyone else.
3. Worrying too much about what others think of you. – As long as you are worried about what others think of you, you are owned by them. If you’re being true to yourself and it isn’t enough for the people around you, change the people around you.
4. Ignoring your gut instincts. –Give yourself permission to immediately walk away from anything that gives you bad vibes.  Just trust the little inner voice when it’s telling you, “This is a bad idea.”
5. Holding on when you need to move on. – Moving on doesn’t mean forgetting, it means you choose happiness over hurt.  Sometimes you have to love people from a distance and give them the space and time to get their minds right before you let them back into your life.
6. Living in the past. – If you don’t leave your past in the past, it will destroy your future.  Live for what today has to offer, not for what yesterday has taken away.  Life is a journey that is only traveled once.  Today’s moments quickly become tomorrow’s memories.  So appreciate every moment for what it is, because the greatest gift of life is life itself.
7.  Doing the wrong things just because others are too. – Wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it.  Right is right, even if you are the only one doing it.  Always do what you know in your heart is right, for you.
8. Allowing small problems to overwhelm you. – Everything is going to be alright; maybe not today but eventually.  When you’re upset, ask yourself, “Will this matter to me in a year’s time?”  Most of the time it won’t.  Remember, sometimes bad things in life open up your eyes to the good things you weren’t paying attention to before.
9. Surrendering to the draw of comfort. – The most common and harmful addiction in the world is the draw of comfort.  The truth is growth begins at the end of your comfort zone.  Stepping outside of your comfort zone will put things into perspective from an angle you can’t grasp now, and open doors of opportunity that would otherwise not exist.
10. NOT believing that you CAN. – If we don’t know that greatness is possible, we won’t bother attempting it.  All too often, we literally do not know any better than good enough.  Sometimes you have to try to do what you think you can’t do, so you realize that you actually CAN.  And sometimes it takes more than one attempt.  If ‘Plan A’ doesn’t work out, don’t fret; the alphabet has another 25 letters that would be happy to give you a chance to get it right.  The wrong choices usually bring us to the right places, eventually.  But you must believe in your own potential to get there.

Source

It has become habit for me to post great life quotes on my Facebook page so when I came across a quote about success earlier this week, I immediately posted to my page. I thought it was a great quote that helped put the word “success” in perspective.

“There are many aspects to success; material wealth is only one component…But success also includes good health, energy and enthusiasm for life, fulfilling relationships, creative freedom, emotional and psychological stability, a sense of well-being, and peace of mind.” – Deepak Chopra

It’s not secret we live in a materialistic society, so it’s easy for us to get caught up in the idea that success in only measurable based on what we have in our physical possession. I’ll admit, I get caught up too. “I don’t make enough money, I need a new car, etc.” But at the end of the day, those things don’t matter.  Being healthy, living life to the fullest, a sense of self and living in peace are things that give us true success and happiness.

How do you define success? Do you agree with Deepak Chopra’s quote?

Tony Gaskins tweeted the words “Don’t be afraid to be amazing!” on Twitter yesterday.  Simple words but a very strong message!  A reminder we could all use.  Don’t be afraid to be the best you can be.  We are all deserving of the wonderful things that are happening in our lives.  A friend and I were talking the other day about all of the wonderful things that are happening in our lives and the lives of our friends.   We are all amazing and have accomplished a lot of great milestones for us to still be in our twenties.

I think the reason we often fear being amazing is because we set an expectation that those great things we only dream about happening won’t really come to fruition. In order to be great, we must rid ourselves of negative thoughts about ourselves and our possibilities.  If we have a positive outlook on life, are passionate about our goals and take a proactive approach to reaching them, our fears should subside and amazing things will begin to happen.

Be amazing!!