I have reached a point of frustration when it comes to my dating life. I’m not even sure you can call it a dating life since it has really been non-existent since I was of the dating age.  But when it comes to my interaction with males, it’s really starting to take its toll on my esteem.

Over the years, I’ve been told that I’m pretty, I’m “wifey” material and any man would be lucky to be with me.  However time and time again I have found that those qualities are not good enough or not what men are really looking for.  More often than not, I have found myself interacting with guys who, at the end of the day, think I’m only good enough to flirt with; never anything more.

I will admit that in the past, when it came to dating, I was a little reserved.  But over the last few years, I made a vow to be more open to giving guys my number and appearing more available. I mean, I’m not getting any younger and if I do want to eventually be in a relationship, I have to be proactive right?

So I took the advice of friends to be less reserved and even after doing so I have gotten nowhere!  I gave one guy my number and later found out the reason he never called to ask me out was because I look like I require too much. What exactly is that suppose to mean?! Can men these days not handle a confident, educated, driven, caring and social woman? If that is the case, then I, along with so many other women I know, are in a lot of trouble when it comes to dating!


Now I know some will say “there are plenty of guys that are out there, but you’d never give them a chance.”  However, I do believe that there has to be an attraction from both parties in order for there to be an interest in dating.  This may be one of the many problems contributing to my current status, but I’m just being honest.

The older we get the more serious we become about relationships. I have two friends that were married within the last year while a number of others are in relationships. It never really bothered me before but now that I’m now closer to 30 than 19 (my dad’s saying, not mine), I begin to take a more serious look at finding a mate.

I know I will be in a relationship when the time is right and at this point I have to truly believe that. I do not pray to God to find me a mate; instead I pray that I be ready when he arrives. I understand, I’m currently on my grind to get my business going and continuing to work toward moving past a place of just being so right now probably is not a good time to focus on dating. All I do know that is after hearing one thing (you’re great, you’re so fly, etc), but experiencing another (not being enough) for so long, no matter what I believe, I can’t help but entertain the question, is there something wrong with me?

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